‘Khwezi’ is Back to haunt us
Yesterday’s newspapers reported that ‘Khwezi,’ the young woman who accused President Jacob Zuma of rape……has come back home to South Africa.
What I found provocative and upsetting was when I saw a tweet from one of our male, youth leaders, referring to the article, saying,
‘There is no story here.’
What do you mean ‘There is no story here?’
A woman says she has been raped and it’s not a big deal to you?
Isn’t this the problem with society? That our men do not take rape seriously?
If our men took rape seriously, then we would not have such high rape statistics….Rape would not be such a norm in South Africa.
Men who do not take Rape seriously turn into rapists.
The Khwezi tragedy happened very quickly.
Wether or not justice was served in Khwezi’s case is what it is, but it does NOT take away from her hurt and trauma.
What happened to Khwezi was extremely traumatic…and public
Sadly it also started a trend in SA.
A trend in which most women, who say that they have been raped are usually not believed.
A rape has to be gruesome and ugly to be believed. Rape is seemingly impossible inside our homes. And apparently is not something done by important men in suits.
As of late, when a woman says she has been raped the immediate reaction is that the man is innocent and the woman has an agenda.
This situation and approach must be extremely frightening for women who have been raped… and MOST welcome by rapists.
How we address rape in this country has given rapists permission to continue on their raping sprees. We have shown rapists that rape is not a serious crime and you can go on to achieve greater heights even after a woman has accused you of rape.
I highly doubt a sane woman would Cry Rape just to fulfil her own agendas. Rape is not an easy crime to fake.
This notion that we women sit there and conspire to destroy men by telling fake rape stories is keeping raped women prisoners.
We have not created a safe environment in which a woman can tell her story without being judged and without her feeling like we are raping her all over again.
How do we expect people to come out about rape, if our 1st reaction is to doubt them?
How do we expect people to heal when we don’t give them a chance to express themselves?
How do we expect to confront Rape, if we are pretending that it does not exist?
So actually…..Khwezi coming back home IS a big deal….because she reminds us of how we banished her to a foreign land when she said a man had forced himself upon her…….not only that, but we went ahead and made the same man our president.
Khwezi….sister….to you and all the women you represent….
I am ashamed and I apologise that I am that soceity that did not stand up for you.
Khwezi is back and we are confronted by Khwezi’s tears……..and the silent tears of all the other Khwezis who we walk with, talk with, and laugh with every day. Every woman that know’s Khwezi’s story.
The woman who has been brutally violated and has tears raging inside of her.
There are women who have to deal with the careless words that men utter.
There are women who have been raped….and dismissed.
And they are MANY.